Tales of the Parodyverse

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L!
Sat Apr 28, 2007 at 05:56:19 pm EDT

Subject
Midnight Conversation: Part 2 of the next Chad & Ronnie epic
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The Dullard's Corner area of Parrodipolis.
A non discript apartment building.
12:35 a.m.

Jane Tarzania is returning from a late night outing. As she exits the elevator & starts down the hallway to her apartment, she looks through purse for her keys. Due to this activity, she doesn't notice the man standing outside near her front door. That is until he's too late to avoid him.

"Miss Tarzania?" he says, which startled her. She didn't expect anyone in the hallway at this time of the night.

After calming down a bit, she replied. "Yes?"

"I'm Lee Bookman, you may not know me.." He said with a hand out stretched. Jane shook shook it as she interrupted him.

"Yes. I know who you are, who doesn't? Your a member of the Lair Legion. Plus, we've meet briefly before. All though I don't know if we were introduced."

Lee had a look of puzzlement on his face.

"My Ex-Boyfriend & I barged into the Lair Mansion one night when our friend Chad was in Jail." Jane said before she put her key in the door to unlock it.

"Oh, yes. Did that matter ever get resolved?"

"Yes." Jane said as she opened the door, walked over the threshold & into her apartment.

"Good Night." she said. As she began to close the door, Lee stopped her.

"You might've been wondering why I was hanging around your door at the time of night?"

"No. Odd things happen to me all the time & I've become use to them."

"Because of Mister Beeslyhuxtoy?"

Paused for a moment & then said "Yes."

"I'd like to talk you about him & his cohort."

"Can we do this another time? It's late & I just want to go to bed. I've got lots of things to do in the morning."

"This won't take long."

Jane paused for a moment, Lee smiled kindly. Jane opened back up the door & motioned that he could enter. He did so.

-------------


A short time later, they were seated. Jane on a her couch, Lee in a armchair facing her. Jane had her coat & shoes off. Lee had his trench coat draped over the back of the chair, he keep his boots on.

"Do you mind if I record this?" he asked.

"No, I guess."

Lee turned slightly to just a device out of pocket in his jacket. It looked to Jane to be the size of an iPod. Lee pressed a button on the side.

"Testing, Testing. Alpha Beta Proxy Six Niner Epsilon. Bookman, Lee. Tarzania, Jane." Lee paused & looked at his watch. " 1.6789.64 Omega, Lunar Standard Time."

Lee places the device on the coffee table between them. Lee had noticed Jane was looking at his notepad.

"What?" He asked.

"Nothing. It's just I was looking at your pad. You have series of numbers around Chad & Ronnie's names."

"Yes, I was trying to figure out if there were any mathematical equations behind their names. If you add up each letter as a number of their full names, you get 144 for Mister Swiss & 430 for Mister Beeslyhuxtoy. If you just take the shortened, more common version of their first names you get 16 & 75 respectively. Plus, you if use the typical touchtone American phone, you get 2423 for Mister Swiss & 766643 for Mister Beeslyhuxtoy. That is if you use the shortened, more common versions, of their first names. Later on I'll look into if their is a U.S phone number & Area Code that matches that."

"Plus, Ronnie has 666 in the middle of his first name." Jane commented after looking at her phone, which was on a table nearby.

Lee jotted that comment down.

"So, what do you want to know?"

"As you probably guessed from our past meeting & just now: I'm researching Misters' Swiss & Beeslyhuxtoy."

"Ok. Why?" Jane said, pausing between each word.

Lee seemed taken aback by the question.

"Your a member of the Lair Legion, you could be researching possibly threats to world at large? Be looking for possibly Villainous uprising that might need the Legion's attention but your spending your time digging up information at Chad & Ronnie?" Jane said some what condescendingly.

"Yes. I'm also doing those things, too."

"Are you?" Jane said not believing him.

"Yes." Lee said hoping to stop the line of questioning.

"Ok. Can you ask your questions? I'd like to go to bed soon." Jane said after looking at the clock on the wall.

"Fair enough. What do you know about the origin of Misters' Swiss & Beeslyhuxtoy?"

Jane stared at him for a moment. "That's your first question?"

"Yes."

"You make them sound like some kind of extinct animal that you can't explain. Now I'll give you that Chad & Ronnie are unexplainable at times but they aren't some kind human subspecies that need to be studied by some egghead with nothing better to do."

Lee noticed some hostility towards to him, he found it very uncalled for. Sure, he knew lots of things but didn't consider himself an "egghead".

"Alright. Let me rephrase that. Do you know how they met?"

"No. I don't think anyone beyond them does."

Lee sighed & then said "Any guesses?"

"It's probably something boring like they met as Kids & grew up together."

That wasn't the origin Lee was looking for. He's found more interesting ones in his research like Donar claims to vaguely remember two long gone missing Minor Godlings of Mischief of a long gone missing Pantheon: one had fiery red hair & his companion that never said a word but played music to communicate.

Lee's thought line was broken up by Jane saying "You know if you really want to know, why not just go the sources: Chad & Ronnie."

"I will. I'm just working my way up the chain. I started with 3rd hand accounts, I'm currently on 2nd hand & last will be 1st hand."

"Is the next person your seeing Catherine?"

"Catherine?"

"Yes. Did you know Chad had a Girlfriend?"

He didn't but didn't say that. "Oh, yes. Mister Swiss' female companion. Do you have her address?"

"No. But I'm sure it's in the phone book. Plus, she's in the same building as Chad & Ronnie. So, the trip between the two of them shouldn't be long." Jane said as she started to get up.

That signaled to Lee that he should collect his things, which he did.

"But, I don't think you should do it tonight. Catherine might be asleep by now."

"Oh. Alright. I might try her tomorrow." Lee said.

After he had stepped into the hallway, he said "Thank you for your time. Pleasant dreams."

He held out his hand, she shook it & thanked him. Jane closed door & Lee made his way to the elevator.

As he rode down, he pulled out his device.

"Xi-J8." Lee said.

The device beeped.

"Cross reference the name Catherine with the building tenants in the building listed under Alpha Beta Proxy Six Niner Epsilon."

The device beeped once again.

By the time Lee exited the elevator, he had an answer. He looked at the device.

"Hmmmm... Catherine Gillespie. She even lives on their same floor." he mused to himself.

He left the building & made he was over there.

-----------------


TO BE CONTINUED....


Next up: The second half of 2nd hand accounts. After that is the 1st hand accounts & you'll never guess how that ends.




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